As promised another of my fav’s. This one was written two years ago, today. I am happy to report I’m doing better in the whining stage of life. Sadly, I still have some growing to do and often wonder will I ever become the grateful person I desire. You know, the one who sees the glass 1/2 full…. Enjoy.
Typically I save these more personal posts for my Reflection’s blog. Today I felt led to post this one here; I hope you enjoy.
I’m tired of growing benign little annoying bumps (don’t ask) and weird dermatological anomalies. I’m tired of this whole aging process. I’m tired of hot flashes, night sweats and everything which goes with this season of life. I am tired of blood tests which come back abnormal. I’m tired of limited mobility. I’m tired of aching bones and joints just because I’m getting older. I don’t like being on a first name basis with doctor’s and specialists. I’m tired of my energy expiring before the tasks of the day are done. I sure could use a few more hours each day too – I don’t get things done as fast as I used too. I’m tired of persistent dust, you know, the dust which reappears 10 minutes after you got rid of it. Why do I bother? I’m tired of never ending stuff. Seems like I’ve been downsizing forever. I’m tired of triple digit heat and no rain. I’m tired of the neighbors who feed the birds, which bring the pigeons who think my fountain is their bathtub. I’m tired of dust storms which make my patio uninhabitable. I’m tired of being undisciplined, both in my writing and eating habits. I’m tired of ______________, I’m tired of ________________, and the list goes on. Finally, I’m tired looking at this list.
Ever felt this way? Ever felt like life was simply hopeless, routine and without any merit? Do you just want to scream sometimes? Well as you can see, you are not alone! Life often gets us down, throws us curve balls, comes too fast, and lets us down. When this happens we do not have to be left without hope. We do not have to stay in the boat of “overwhelmness” to be tossed to and fro by the waves. In recent years, I’d have sat on the boat whining and crying, overwhelmed, wanting someone to rescue me. I’ve since learned I have control and choices in my life. I can choose to have a pity-party or I can choose to go to the Lord praising Him with a heart of gladness; changing my focus from the have-nots to the blessings. It’s not easy some days.
Changing the voice which says I’m tired of _____ to the voice which says I’m thankful is powerful and well worth the effort! For example: when my body grows bumps and develops weird dermatological anomalies, or when my blood tests come back abnormal, I can say, “Lord, I am thankful and filled with gratitude you’ve provided me with doctors who know me by name, have great skill and who I trust. I’m thankful these tumors and such are nothing more than benign little nuisances.” “Lord, being in this season of my life brings a few challenges, but I am grateful for the opportunities, as I maneuver the aging process, to share with others what I’m learning. Yes, I have limited mobility, aching bones and joints; the good news…. I have mobility in spite of my physical limitations. I’m extremely grateful for your miraculous healing! I suspect without those limitations I would move at a fast pace leaving you in the wake of all my activity.” “I thank you that through many trials and situations I’m experiencing your faithful provision, intervention and healing.”
“As for the dust and the birds… Lord, please forgive my ungrateful attitude. You provided my hubby and me with a wonderful home and great neighbors. Living in the desert I yearn for the ocean; you provided my fountain. Here in the coolness of the morning I enjoy the sound of rushing water and my soul is refreshed; we have some great conversations here. I love the time spent together, enjoying the beauty found in nature, as you teach me how to draw near to you.” “I’m blessed by your Spirit who gifted me in this season of life to write; who’d have thunked” “As for being undisciplined… you and I are working on this together. Thank you for helping me see my being undisciplined is a form of Idol worship; ouch.” “I am blessed with great friends, a hubby who loves unconditionally and a beautiful white sugary cat which fits our personalities and lifestyle to a tee. Oh, Father, I’m blessed beyond measure and beyond anything I deserve.”
From pity-party to praise party; I feel better already.
Until next time,
“Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.” Isaiah 41:30-31
“Don’t be deceived, my dear brothers. Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows.”
“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” Matthew 11:28-30